This post is partly a humorous play on words, and partly a self check-in/reminder for us all not to be ass-souls, either to ourselves OR to other people.
It’s also a reminder to keep things light. The self-development and spiritual worlds are a little too serious sometimes!
Credit for this pun goes to Jayne, a member of my Facebook group in response to a meme I created, in which I joked…
The meme is a response to the spiritual concept that our souls or higher selves make decisions about the lessons they’d like to learn in their next human incarnation. Before we’re even born!
Because while our soul might’ve felt like those decisions were a good idea at the time, they aren’t the ones living out those decisions. Our human selves are. It’s kinda ass-soul behavior!
I posted that in my group and Jayne’s very on-pointe pun in reply was “Ass-souls”!
When I’d stopped LOL-ing, I started pondering…
What does it mean to be an ass-soul? To yourself? To others?
Let’s start with the ways you might you be acting like an ass-soul to yourself.
The two main themes are disempowering yourself and buying into spiritual delusion:
- You might be giving yourself a hard time about your own progress – “Why am I STILL dealing with this issue?”
- I’m soooo broken (actually you’re not!) and I’ve got SUCH a long journey before I’ll be okay
- Believing that others are more powerful/special than you
- OR the reverse… believing that you’re more powerful/special than others!
- Buying into spiritual experiences as “absolute truth” instead of questioning what happened – as well as the influences might’ve contributed to what you experienced
- Interpreting every spiritual experience as a positive sign that you’re on the right track (what if they aren’t?)
- Choosing to believe you’re having spiritual experiences that you’re not, because it makes you feel better about yourself in some way
- Acting superior or arrogantly towards others – “I’m further ahead/better/more enlightened”
I’m sure you’ve got a few ideas on how you’re being an ass-soul towards yourself!
So then, let’s talk about what it means to be an ass-soul to others
Actually, it’s kind of the same thing, but externalised instead of internalised.
Which is about either giving away your power to others, OR trying to exert your power and influence over others in ways that aren’t ethical or respectful of other people’s free will and personal integrity.
Being an ass-soul to others by giving away your power might look like:
- Expecting a miracle cure from someone, anyone…and being disappointed when they don’t deliver (keep in mind that all healing is cumulative!)
- Looking to healers, spiritual teachers or mentors to give you all the answers
- Putting others on a pedestal (as per my friend Dr Nat’s awesome post)
An ass-soul aiming to disempower others might look like:
- Using spiritual-speak to influence others, without knowing what the heck you’re talking about
- Thinking it’s okay to offer guidance to someone without their request or permission…and that guidance is telling them what they need
- “Barging in” to other people’s energy fields, and reading them or give solutions that weren’t asked for
- Cribbing your spiritual knowledge from other sources and sharing it as if its your own without crediting your sources
- You don’t have a mentor and think you don’t need one, despite offering those services to others
- You only ever do “self-healings” because you think you can handle all your own shizz
- You think you’ve got ALL the answers, all of the time or can easily tune in and get them without seeking reflection or verification from those who aren’t attached to your beliefs or desired outcomes
- Creating your own “spiritual lingo”
- A belief that you can manifest whatever you like, and that getting what you want is a sign you’re a good manifestor vs a good manipulator
- When you diss other modalities, or practitioners, or claim your work is superior to other people’s
Don’t get me wrong… we’ve all been ass-souls!
I sure have! After all, we’re only human. We’re fallible, and here to learn, grow and expand.
Which is why it’s important to have a self-reflection practice, develop your discernment and keep an eye out for red flags either as a student or a leader.
Just…do your best not to be an ass-soul!
But if you are? Then try this…
- Acknowledge your shitty behaviour. We all do it, and it’s okay to make mistakes. But do your best to learn from them so you don’t repeat them over and over again.
- Develop a self-reflection practice, if you don’t have one. Which may include journaling and meditating, but it’s also helpful to have friends and a mentor who’ll lovingly call you on your BS when they see it.
Being an ass-soul comes down to spiritual delusion: This can be about not feeling good enough OR about being overly arrogant and confident in your spiritual prowess.
Not feeling good enough is one of the core wounds we carry as humans – don’t let your fears of not enough-ness turn you into an ass-soul!
Either way, spiritual delusion is an ego trap
Which keeps you from being free, and truly connecting with the highest source of unity consciousness.
If you buy into your egoic stories, then it becomes quite difficult to see clearly, especially if you start to believe that your spiritual wisdom is the best and only source of truth.
What if you’ve made a big, stinky error in your perception of truth?
Who can ever point out the errors in your thinking/feeling/perceiving if your belief is that you’re wayyyy more right than anyone else?
It’s healthy for your perception of self and others, to not be “right” about everything you believe! To be open to being wrong allows you to possibly learn more about yourself in ways you didn’t expect.
Beliefs about our identity, who and what we are are, can be our biggest challenge!
The great balancer to being an ass-soul is… humility
Humility is the quality of seeing everyone as equal and the same as you, no matter what.
No better or worse than you are, no matter their education level, experience, age, gender, race or religion. Modesty. Not identifying yourself as the “do-er” of your accomplishments.
Not seeing your work or contributions to the world as more valuable than anyone else’s. No matter the outcome of your work!
Do you suspect you’re currently being an ass-soul?
Don’t worry, it’s totally reversible! Here’s a few ideas…
- Seek a spiritual mentor to work with. If you’ve been working with the same one for a long time, you may want to do a review and consider if they’re still the right person for you. You want someone who won’t coddle you, or blow smoke up your butt. You want a mentor who’ll challenge your assumptions and beliefs and help you keep it real!
- Step up/change your meditation practice and/or add in some journaling work to help you begin to see and understand your thought processes more clearly
- Take an inventory of your stories about yourself, others, your work, what you value about yourself, and your attitudes and feelings about your flaws.
Red flags include: when you think you don’t have any redeeming qualities or if you’re unable to name aspects of yourself you’d like to do more work on.
A personal example… one of my areas for improvement is “softening”. I’m all about the truth, and I don’t pull punches. Most people know that even when I’m being loving and kind, I can be a bit like an elephant in a china shop! So, I’ve been finding ways to soften and relaxing my messaging for what seems like forever. However… it’s still an area of growth and learning for me.
Need an ass-soul check-up? (LOL!)
Book a Kinesiology session and let’s do some self-reflection work together, so you can be kinder to yourself and/or others.
Much love (and laughs!)
P.S. This piece took quite a long time to finish because of all the inappropriate and highly amusing puns I did NOT add in. 😉
Ambha Amanda Roberts is a Kinesiologist, Intuitive Healer, educator and facilitator based on the Sunshine Coast, Australia. She offers Kinesiology sessions both in-person and via Skype/Zoom all over the world.
Ambha Amanda is the co-creator of Adventures of Staria, which includes a series of Staria cards, and an upcoming book for children (including inner children).