So many of us live with the fear of failure!
It hangs over our heads like this incredible, ultimate threat:
OH MY GAWWWWWD WHAT IF I FAIL?!
So yeah… WHAT IF we aim for our dreams and fail?
This singular thought stops so many people in their tracks!
To the point that they never even get started and those precious dreams about how life would be if they could only be guaranteed success… remain idle “what if’s”.
What if you have a dream?
It’s so dear to your heart, it’s almost painful to think about it.
What if you spent a lot of time thinking about making your dream a reality?
Only to couple that with feeling so overwhelmed that you become disheartened.
What if you watched someone else succeed at what you want to do?
And you’re still in the job that’s slowly shutting down your heart and soul?
What if you tried, and didn’t make it?
ZOMG how embarrassment, right?
I get it, I do.
Anyone who’s ever had a career sea change or started their own business… we’ve all had variations of the above thought processes.
But you’ve been given a gift
- The gift of an idea that’s unique to you.
- The gift of inspiration that might have a positive impact on the world.
- The gift of knowing that you’re here with a specific purpose.
Yeah you, you’re here to share yourself and your talents with the rest of the world!
I know, I know… it can be less than easy to step up to the challenge!
After all, making your dreams a reality takes effort and new skills and learnings and hard work.
However… NOT going for your dream can be heartbreaking
Stifling. The world becomes smaller. Less enjoyable. Less interesting.
But going for it?
Argghhhh, how can we even begin with that big-ass threat of the F-word (failure, you guys!) hanging over our heads?
What if neither failure or success are end-point destinations?
How would that change your “deer in the headlights” feeling around stepping towards your heart’s desires?
I like to ask my clients questions such as:
- Can you name something you’d say you’re good at doing right now?
- Was there a time when you didn’t feel so competent with that skill or task?
- Do you remember when that changed to feeling on top of your game in that area?
- And how did you get to that point of feeling good about your level of competence?
Here’s the cliff notes version of the answers: Practice, experience and not giving up.
For everything you now consider yourself competent in doing, there was a time when that wasn’t true.
Anyone remember the first time you got behind the wheel of a car as a learner driver?!
(I’m pretty sure my whole family still remembers when I was learning to drive!)
You CAN learn the skills you need to help you achieve your goals
Whatever you feel like you can’t do right now, remember you’ve got the ability to learn those skills. It’s just a matter of identifying what you need to learn and chasing down that information.
You could do your own research on the internet, pick the brain of someone you admire, or hire a coach.
For many people starting a new business, there can be a lot of hang ups around marketing or dealing with clients or money or even being the face of your own business!
Oh yeah, and failure generally isn’t fatal
If your first, second or tenth attempt doesn’t work out… you’re probably not going to depart this world as a result!
Failure is how we learn.
Harking back to being a learner driver: if we fail to master reverse parallel parking on our first go, it isn’t the end of the world.
By failing and practicing again and again, we get to refine the actions required to guide a car into the parking spot.
However, if we sit there in the driver’s seat and DON’T practice reverse parallel parking, we’re NEVER going to do it very well, are we?
It’s only the ongoing practice and enquiry into how your body and breath respond that teaches you what to do.
All those fears are actually beliefs that no longer serve you…
At some point in your life you picked up ideas and beliefs around what it means to succeed (YAY! I’M SO AWESOME!!) and what it means to fail (WORST THING IN THE WORLD!).
Another question I frequently ask my clients: how’s that working out for you in relation to making your dreams and goals a reality? 🙂
One of my clients recently realised that at the tender age of four, he’d absorbed ideas about running a business from his Dad and those ideas were impacting his thoughts around success in present time!
As life evolves and you realise that you need to take a few risks and make changes in order to be happy… those old beliefs can hinder your ability to get where you want to be.
That’s where Kinesiology can be a huge help, in detecting and clearing old belief patterns, ideas and fears that are out of alignment with your current goals.
Wanna get out of your own way? Book a Kinesiology session today!
Book a session now using my online booking system.
It’d be an absolute pleasure and an honour to help you find a clearer and more courageous pathway forward in your life.
Ambha Amanda Roberts is a Kinesiologist, Intuitive Healer, educator and facilitator based on the Sunshine Coast, Australia. She offers Kinesiology sessions both in-person and via Skype/Zoom all over the world.
Ambha Amanda is the co-creator of Adventures of Staria, which includes a series of Staria cards, and an upcoming book for children (including inner children).